First Annual Absolute Gordies

Categordie	Submitter	Matt's Pick	Chris' Pick
Zeb Wells Award for Single Issue or Story that ruled but the internet hated for some reason	Matt Fiction	Chip Zdarsky - Batman "Failsafe"	No Answer "I don't know what people don't like"
Doughboy Award for Never Getting Over	Jolene	Dark Broody Space Ghost	Jenny Sparks and The Designate Tarene
Sara Lance Memorial Award for DC Character from other media not yet in comics	Jolene	Nocturna - Batman The Caped Crusader	Harley Quinn - Batman The Caped Crusader
Best AEW Origins Insert in a DC Comic	Andrew "Ewzzy" Rayburn	Toni Storm
Goku at 41 Award for thing you might most weirdly to get into in 2025	Ben Gully and Philip Monroe	Chainsaw Man	"One of the podcasts we've threatened to do" Vampire Hunter D, Home Improvement, Gotham, House of Leaves
Most Buckwild Use of Wrestling Outside of Wrestling	Kate Bishop	Daniel Warren Johnson - Transformers	Godzilla goes Super Saiyan, hits Spear and Jackhammer
Chris' Shirt Memorial Award for Hypest Moment That Made You Want to Tear Your Shirt Off	Kate Bishop	Spider-Man vs Tombstone going out the window - ASM #58-59	God of Dogs in Doctor Strange, Dune 2 "Paul Cuts an Ernest the Cat Miller I can whoop anybody in here promo"
Game of the Year	Kate Bishop	Balatro	Metaphor ReFantazio
Favorite Thing That Didn't Come Out in 2024 but This is the Year You Got Into It	Kate Bishop	The Traitors (UK Edition)	The End of Berserk
Chance Boudreaux Award for New Comic/Movie/Show That Rules the Hardest Despite Being Objectively Bad	"The Boss Dog" Patrick O'Duffy	Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes	No Answer "I liked good things this year"
Fuckable Richard Kind Award for Actor/Musician/Comics Creator etc. With the Most Exciting New Project That Dropped in 2024	"The Boss Dog" Patrick O'Duffy	John Mulaney - Everybody's in LA	Kendrick Lamar "Destroying Drake with an Ozymandias plot"
Hell No Helene Award for Charity or Grassroots Movement that did the most good in 2024 and deserves to be supported in 2025	"The Boss Dog" Patrick O'Duffy	Beloved Asheville	Deferred to Matt
Jared Stevens Award for Favorite New Blorbo	"The Boss Dog" Patrick O'Duffy	Rek Rap - Spider-Man	Schierke - Berserk
Best Women's Wrestling Match	Robert Hedley	Kris Statlander vs Mercedes Moné - AEW World's End 2024
Best Sporting Moment	Robert Hedley	Hangman Page Burning Down Swerve's Childhood Home
Neron Memorial Award for All Time Best Mark Waid Helmed Crossover Intended to Shake Up the Powers of Familiar Characters	Thomas Foss	Absolute Power (by default)
Miles Morales Prize for Best New Alternate Universe Version of a Familiar Character	Thomas Foss	Absolute Alfred Pennyworth	Thick (Absolute) Batman
Ultimate Peter Parker's Hair Trophy for Worst Change to an Alternative Universe Version of a Character	Thomas Foss	Ultimate Iron Man/Iron Lad	Absolute Lois Lane being a private military cop
Crack Stuntman Award for Excellence in Adapting a 1980s Property Designed Primarily to Sell Toys	Thomas Foss	Larry Hama - G.I. Joe
Texter's Choice Award 2024	William Schmidt	Chip Zdarsky - Batman, Zeb Wells - Amazing Spider-Man, Roxxon Presents Thor	Every Al Ewing Book
Most Promising New Comics Imprint	William Schmidt	Absolute - DC Comics
Most Romanceable NPC Who is Unfortunately Not Romanceable	Grant Volker	Igon - Elden Ring: Shadow of the Erdtree	Catherina Grann - Metaphor ReFantazio
Thing You Finally Watched/Read/Played That Turned Out to be Way Better Than it Had Any Right to Be	David LaRoss	Lower Decks	Death Note
Thing You Finally Watched/Read/Played That Turned Out to be Way Worse Than it Should've Been	David LaRoss	Dead Space Remake	Almost Famous
Special Achievement in Picking Up a Theme or Plotline Grant Morrison Set Up and Running Full Speed Ahead Instead of Ignoring It Like a Fucking Coward	David LaRoss	No Winner
Best Dressed Award for Person/Character/Wrestler Who Found Their Real Clothes in 2024	Josh Sinason	Rogue	Bryan Danielson - Return of Maroon
Benjamin J. Grimm Award For Best Time Someone Let Us Know What Time it is	Isobel M	Fantastic Four - Johnny gets choked by an alien	Absolute Batman driving his dump truck out of that building, Paul cutting a promo to say "Start some shit" in Dune 2
Best Moment from a Star Trek You Watched in 2024	Charlie Etheridge Nunn	There are four lights	Sisko leaving his baseball on his desk because he's gonna be back for it
Most Kyle Starks Moment in a Comic Not Actually Written by Kyle Starks	Charlie Etheridge Nunn	The concept of the character Backdrop - Minor Threats: Fastest Way Down	Monsters made out of dicks from Berserk (out of context)
Favorite "That's Goku" Moment	Charlie Etheridge Nunn	No Answer	Goku Macy's Day Parade Balloon
"I read all of DragonBall" Award for Manga Series Matt and Chris Will Read Next	Dan Sylvester	Chainsaw Man	Naruto?
"I Can't Believe The Absolute Books Are Good" Award for Favorite Moment from an Absolute or Ultimate Book This Year"	Dan Sylvester	Sticking up for the miners in Brazil - Absolute Superman	BatmanAF - Absolute Batman
"That's my name or face" Award for Best Appearance of a War Rocket Ajax Host in Comics This Year	Chris Kiser	No Answer and now Matt is SAD	Chris showing up on Magneto's list of people he saved
Metroidvania Most Likely to be Secretly a Trap Created by Arcade or The Riddler	Greg Cashman	Animal Well
Brennan Lee Mulligan Award for Best TTRPG Moment from a Personal Game or Actual Play	Shawn Bell	The Adventure Zone vs Dracula	Fantasy High Season 3
Most Upsetting Use of Reed Richards' Power	Joshua Golden	Stretching to cover Madison Square Garden		Stretching to cover Madison Square Garden
Adrian Paul and Cary Elwes Award for Best Sword Fight	Brad Ellison	Paul Atreides vs Feyd-Rautha - Dune 2
The Most Absolutely Essential Ultimate Thingy	Kevin Maroney	Absolute Superman	DragonBall Super
Best Recommendation from 2024 You're Going to Get Into in 2025, Really	Greg Black	Lies of P	Benito's movie and TV recommendations
Favorite Comics Run You Guys Love That The Unwashed Masses Hate	Dugan Nash	Zeb Wells - Amazing Spider-Man
Favorite Animated Spin Off of a Beloved Sci-Fi TV Series That Ended This Year	Dugan Nash	Lower Decks
Dummy Thicc Batman Award for Best Superhero Redesign	Chris Cole	Absolute Wonder Woman	Absolute Batman
The Draco Memorial Award for Most Overdue Retcon	Chris Cole	Mystique and Destiny are Nightcrawler's Parents
Reed Richards' Binocular Eyes Award for Most Unsettling Artwork	Chris Cole	Reed getting bit by all those vampires while stretching over MSG	(In context) Monsters made out of dicks from Berserk
"What if Goku was there?" Award for Story Most Improved by Adding Son Goku	Isaac Jansens	Ducks	If Goku was in Dune, shit would've gone down real different"
Geoff Johns Award for Comic You Most Wish You Hadn't Devoted Time to Reading	Robert Secundas	J. Michael Straczynski - Captain America	Tom King - Jenny Sparks
Excellence in Questioning Award for StoneColdHCC Question That Made You Laugh the Hardest	Robert Secundas	"Y'all think Bizarro thinks Jeopardy is just a regular game show?"	No Answer (Can't remember)
Maximum Carnage Award for Comic You Know is Not Good but Your Lizard Brain Keeps Trying to Convince You is Better Than it is	Rocket Whitsel	Dan Jurgens - Thor
"Not a Sponsor but Could Be" Award for Product That Especially Stood Out to You and Made You Compelled to Talk About It	Rocket Whitsel	Unnamed Cereal Brand that said no to being a sponsor	Kinfire Delve Card Game
Best Sword	Derek Allen	Wonder Woman's Dragonslayer	Wonder Woman's Dragonslayer
Chris Jericho Award for Character That Has Most Worn Out Their Welcome	Ryan Holiday	Juggernaut	Rek Rap
Gimmick Street Directory Award for Best New Ajax Lore	Peter Vellez	Gimmick Street Sports	Off Brand Stores (The Vitamin Store, Party Citi)
War Rocket Ajax Intercontinental Championship	Matt and Chris	Kentaro Miura and Akira Toriyama
Gordie in the Bank Briefcase	Matt and Chris	The Absolute line creative team