Word Heavyweight Champion

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Word Heavyweight Champion was an after-interview segment in 2015 after Every Story Ever was spun off into special episodes. Unlike other lists, there was a hard limit of 100 entries, so things that were not as excellent as the 100th entry fell off the list.

The List

  1. “Do good to others and every man can be a Superman.” – The Last Days of Superman
  2. “It’s clobberin’ time!” — Fantastic Four
  3. “Lord Death Man came back to life using secret yoga tricks, but I resurrected myself with the strength of righteousness.” – Batman, Jiro Kuwata’s Batmanga
  4. “You don’t get it, boy. This isn’t a mudhole. It’s an operating table. And I’m the surgeon.” — Batman, DKR
  5. “You brought a you to a me fight.” — Sexcastle
  6. “Miss.” — Preacher
  7. “Well! Here comes ol’ Charlie Brown! Good ol’ Charlie Brown…yes sir! Good ol’ Charlie Brown. How I hate him!” – Peanuts first strip
  8. “I own Airwolf.” — Achewood
  9. “But I am the revelation! The Tiger-Force at the core of all things! When you cry out in your dreams, it is Darkseid that you see!” — Forever People #3
  10. “Doomed planet. Desperate scientists. Last Hope. Kindly couple.” -All-Star Superman #1
  11. “Samantha Brown, you have to get our of there! Your vagina is haunted!” – Tarot: Witch of the Black Rose #53
  12. “Don’t mess with me, lady. I’ve been drinking with skeletons.” – Hellboy: The Island
  13. “Yes, it is his gift to us, friends. The cosmic hunting license! The right to point the finger, or the gun!” – Forever People #3
  14. “I love you.” — Rewind, Transformers: More than Meets the Eye
  15. “Then we’ll go down that old shark’s mouth together — and beat her to death from the inside!” -Big Barda, Mr. Miracle
  16. “It’s never as bad as it seems. You’re much stronger than you think you are. Trust me.” — All Star Superman #1
  17. “He stood alone at Gjallerbru, and that answer is enough.” — Thor #362
  18. “You didn’t really beat me! You’ll never beat me! I’m just too stupid and ugly to know when to quit!” — The Thing, MTIO Annual #7
  19. “I’ll love you ’til the goddamn stars go out.” – Jesse Custer, Preacher #66
  20. “I don’t need a jetpack. All I need is HATE.” – Punisher 2099
  21. “It’s bears!”–Punisher: Welcome Back Frank #4
  22. “Welcome to the X-Men, Kitty Pryde. Hope you survive the experience!” — Uncanny X-Men
  23. “Try the red one.” — Ikari, Daredevil
  24. “Darkseid is.” — JLA #13
  25. “Love or hate. Life or death. Betty or Veronica.” – Life with Archie #1
  26. “This is an imaginary story. Aren’t they all?” – Whatever Happened to the Man of Tomorrow?
  27. “I love you, Lois Lane. Until the end of time.” — All-Star Superman #12
  28. "Ain’t no closing time, boys, but you gotta leave your guns at the door.” – Hitman
  29. “I’ll be tougher than the toughies and sharper than the sharpies, and I’ll make my money square.” – Scrooge McDuck
  30. “It was a nice piece of work, Kingpin. You shouldn’t have signed it.” — Daredevil: Born Again
  31. “Godzilla got busy.” – Godzilla vs. Barkley #1
  32. “If you knew how much you were loved, not one of you would raise your hand in rage again.” — Superman, JLA/Hitman #3
  33. “Face it, tiger. You just hit the jackpot!” — Mary Jane Watson
  34. “Ultron. We would have words with thee.” — Thor, Ultron Unlimited
  35. “You should have brought more Thors.” — Thor: God of Thunder
  36. “Seeing two trains make love is a very rare, very special sight.” -Tales Designed to Thrizzle vol. 2
  37. “These no-nonsense solutions of yours just don’t hold water in a complex world of jet-powered apes and time travel.” – JLA Classified #3
  38. “You gotta be one of the good guys, son, ’cause there’s way too many of the bad.” — Preacher #9
  39. “I’m loyal to nothing, general, except the dream.” – Daredevil: Born Again
  40. “That’s for me to know and for you to die!” – Dr. Dinosaur, Atomic Robo: OTher Strangeness
  41. “I did it thirty-five minutes ago.” — Watchmen
  42. “Professor X is a jerk!” — X-Men 168
  43. “The world must never again make the fatal error of mistaking compassion for weakness, and while I live, it won’t.” — Captain America, Avengers #6
  44. “Gaze into the fist of Dredd!” — 2000 AD / Judge Dredd
  45. "That bullshit little man ain’t my brother! He’s just a crappy little bullshit man! Everyone can see that!” – Ray Smuckles, Achewood
  46. ”I’ll admit: if I were a gorilla and got super powers, I’d probably want to exact revenge on humans, too.” – Robin, Jiro Kuwata’s BATMANGA
  47. “Nobody dies. It’s a rule.” — Flash #54
  48. “The straitjacket’s kindergarten. Locks too. Bench-pressing a pine coffin lid through six hundred pounds of loose soil, crushing your lungs flat and shredding your dehydrated muscle? That’s difficult… but far from impossible.” – Batman #681
  49. Where’s my money, honey?” – Luke Cage, Hero For Hire #8
  50. “Princess, I’ve seen the way you look at me. You’re not that straight.” — America Chavez, Young Avengers #18
  51. “I was a god, Valeria. I found it…beneath me.” – Doctor Doom, Fantastic Four #611
  52. “Never worry what other people think of you, because no one ever thinks of you.” -Saga #12
  53. “Darkseid always hated music.” — Final Crisis #7
  54. "Compared to you, I’m Chris Isaak.” — Starman #4
  55. “No more mister knife guy.” — I Can Kill Anything
  56. “The world be damned. Doom endures!” – Fantastic Four #9
  57. “Gentlemen. They say when you die, you can’t take it with you, which begs the question: Exactly what am I going to do with all these bullets?” – The Punisher, Secret Wars #1
  58. “If you think payback’s bad, you haven’t met Frank Castle.” – Punisher: Born #1
  59. “Who’s faster is a question children ask, not friends.” — Hitman #48
  60. “Whatever knows fear burns at the touch of the Man-Thing!” — Man-Thing
  61. “Death Race 2000! I am President Frankenstein!” — Nextwave
  62. “I’ll kill you to death!” – Superman Prime, Countdown #3
  63. “You pursue me past your dying! Are you man or fiend from hell?!” — Batman #244
  64. Yeah, well, I have flames on my chest. It’s a lot to live up to.” – Rodimus, MTMTE #18
  65. “The L word? You mean…lesbians?” – Scott Pilgrim
  66. “Calling Batman! Big trouble in Internet 3.0!” – Batman Inc. #7
  67. “Come with me if you want to be awesome.” – Young Avengers #1
  68. “Crom help me, I’ve slain a man tonight, not a beast.” – Conan, Rogues in the House
  69. “The future is worth the fight.” – Martian Manhunter #1,000,000
  70. “It’s just us in here together, and we’re all we’ve got.” — All-Star Superman #12
  71. “Try fighting the Wermacht, mister — It teaches you focus!” — Cap, Avengers vs. JLA #4
  72. “You’re everything great about this country and you don’t even know it.” — Hitman #34
  73. “This is a sample of my fist!” — Luke Cage, Hero For Hire
  74. “Robots. Pirates. Hulk Hogan in paradise. I ain’t impressed with a thing.” – Stone Cold Steve Austin, WWE Superstars #9
  75. “Not enough gun.” — Saint of Killers
  76. “Nothing good comes from hate.” – Pluto
  77. “Fight for a world that hates and fears them!” — X-Men
  78. “Love has no point. Love is the point.” — Wildstorm Spotlight: Mr. Majestic
  79. “You’re pretty good, toots, but me? I’m magic.” — Daredevil #181
  80. “I look back over the last 4,000,000 years and realize there have only been two constants: Hate and you.” – Megatron, Transformers #22
  81. “I used my violence on them!” – Atomic Robo
  82. “I’m the best there is at what I do, and what I do isn’t very nice.” — Wolverine
  83. “Live, Scott. Live. All I ever did was die on you.” – Jean Grey, New X-Men #150
  84. “With great power comes great responsibility.” — Amazing Fantasy #15
  85. “Look, kiddo. You can’t take on all the problems of the world. We’re just a few kids, and neurotic weirdo misfit outsiders at that.” — Boom Boom, New Mutants
  86. “My God. Nobody helped you?” — Captain America, The Truth #7
  87. “I have shown him that a man without hope is a man without fear.” — Daredevil: Born Again
  88. “When you’re as good as I am, this is humble.” — WicDiv #4
  89. “If there is nothing but what we make of this world, brothers, let us make good.” – Beta Ray Bill in Secret Invasion Aftermath: Beta Ray Bill - The Garden of Eden #1
  90. “I didn’t come here for a whisper. I want to hear you scream.” — World War Hulk
  91. “Even though I’ve never wanted a drink more, I’ve never needed one less. Let’s go.” — Iron Man #230
  92. “Let’s none more goth this hole into the ground.” — WicDiv
  93. “You think I’m working with Superman? Back to cop school, guys!” — Action Comics #3
  94. “To me, my X-Men!” — X-Men #1
  95. “Criminals are a superstitious and cowardly lot.” — Detective #33
  96. “Only a bitter little adolescent boy would confuse realism for pessimism.” — Flex Mentallo
  97. “The police wouldn’t think to look for your body on Saturn!” — Injustice: Gods Among Us
  98. "Just as I expected. Bekor was unfamiliar with the 19th Century wrestling holds that I am an expert in!” – Abraham Lincoln, Flash #210
  99. “Okay, suckers, you took your best shot — now it’s my turn!” — X-Men 132
  100. “Wrestling’s a sport, the only TRUE sport! No wimpy time outs, no padding or protection!” — Sting, WCW Comics

Note: This page is, strictly speaking, out of canon with WRA continuity.

To update this list with links to episodes, please consult the original list and the blog archive.